Okay, so it’s nearly July, not exactly topical to be talking about Christmas songs, particularly not this one, because let’s face it, it’s an absolute balls-up of a tune. It just doesn’t add up on any level why the Thin White Duke would team up with the Cros and sign a Christmas song. It can’t have been money, because it’s not like it’s the dollar slamdunk that say, Dancing In The Streets with Jagger, would have seemed like on paper. The actuality of that song, of course, was enough to make Martha Reeves and the Vandellas sew up their ears and gouge out their eyes, while we all realised it was entirely possible that these two giants of music had been furiously stroking each over off in a coke-induced fervour mere seconds before the camera rolled.
But why’s Dave’s other misconceived duet here? It’s not the music, of course, but the baffling, too-crazy-even-to-have-been-improvised conversation Bing and Ziggy get in to, involving:
References to two bizarre off screen characters called Hudson and Sir Percival.
Dave saying that he doesn’t know who Bing is only to follow later with a White Christmas dig.
The puzzling line: “I like John Lennon and the other one er… Harry Nilsson”
However the undoubted highlight and your moment of pleasure for today is Dave’s claim that “Sir Percival lets me use his piano if he’s not around. He’s not around, is he?” The way there’s not even a millisecond pause between the sentences instantly makes Bowie sound like an out-and-out liar. Not just any liar either, more of a “I’ll say anything I can to gain entrance to homes to steal appliances to feed my dirty drug habit” kind of liar. What a guy.